Posted in Education, Family, Library, literature, Opinion, parenting, pop culture, reading, Uncategorized

6 Children’s books that are just wrong

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I love seeing spoofs of children’s literature, even the obscene ones. However, as I was reading to my daughter the other night I started to notice there’s enough creepy nonsense in a lot of these stories to begin with. Spoofs may not even be necessary.

So now I will ruin some childhood classics-

Corduroy


Corduroy is one of my favorites. I loved it as a kid and I love reading it still. However, this is the first book that I really was like, “huh, I can’t believe I didn’t notice that before.” In most of the pages all the other toys are staring straight ahead, with that deadpan flopped head look they are supposed to have.

When Lisa comes back to buy Corduroy however, things turn dark. All the toys glare at poor Corduroy and the bunny next to him stares hard with bright red eyes. RED EYES?

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Goodnight Moon

You man already know my stance on Goodnight Moon. It’s not great. It’s so easy to find flaws in this comically nonsensical children’s book. One can argue that Brown was a revolutionary, writing children’s books that represented life at the time of publishing (1947). Before that most children’s story were telling tales of far away places, fairy tales, and other things that were not super relatable to children.

I would still have to say…I just can’t stand it.

Why is that fireplace so big? Where are the parents stopping the children from toppling in and cooking themselves into a nice rabbit stew? Who is the decorator, because they need to be fired.

Green walls, red carpet, yellow and blue curtains, we want this child’s room to be avante garde…nailed it. Oh, but throw in a tiger skin rug, that will really pull everything together.

The color scheme we're going for is

Love You Forever

I know some of you are going to be like “noooo, leave Love You Forever alone!” but come on. Books blog

Why is she crawling? Why is she crawling into her teenage son’s room? I have a son, I will not be doing that.

Then continue on to see her spooning her adult son like he’s still an infant. Shoulder to cry on? Sure. Rocking to sleep at 25? Probably not.

In a Dark Dark Room


At least this book is supposed to be creepy, but I had to add it. I saw in another post someone mentioned the green ribbon story. I second that fear. That story has stuck with me my whole life. When I started teaching I saw this book in our collection and was like “oh man, that freaking girl with the ribbon is in there, nope”.

And Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark? The stories aren’t even scary but those drawings are terrifying. Image result for scary stories to tell in the dark

Arthur

There really isn’t anything wrong with the Arthur books, I actually really like Arthur. Arthur the Aardvark, the story goes that Marc Brown’s son wanted a story about a weird animal and the first one that popped into Brown’s head was an aardvark. The first illustration is from the original Arthur books published in the 70’s. The middle is Arthur’s transformation in the 80’s. Then the last is him now. I can’t even tell what the last Arthur is anymore! Is he a dog? A giant hamster type thing? Maybe a bear?

Richard Scarry Butcher Shop

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So the butcher character is in multiple Richard Scarry books but there’s a common theme for the character…it’s a pig. A pig, slicing up ham and sausage and pork chops and bacon and…yeah it’s a little gross.

Curious George Takes a Job

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Curious George is a favorite at my house. I did not realize this one particular book actually has quite the following. Curious George Takes a Job is like all classic Curious George tales of mishap and mayhem…except this time George tries ether.

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So…yeah kids try drugs and feel like you’re flying and rings and stars will dance around your heads then you’ll pass out with a giant smile on your face while your family looks down at you in shock. I guess it’s accurate at least.

What are some more classics that maybe need to be reread with adult eyes?

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Posted in DIY, Family, Opinion, parenting, Uncategorized

The Closet- Minimized

closet

This smattering of clothes and piles of random items was my closet. It’s embarrassing how bad it got but I have to show the disarray in order to show the difference that downsizing can make. In this picture, our master bedroom, we had two dressers (one for each- mine is on the other side of the room), a closet (not walk in but not too small), and a mess of shoes, hats, and misc home stuff on the ground. We don’t even have doors on the closet so I have to look at this every morning. Not a great way to start the day.

This post contains affiliated links that help me survive, apparently I’m supposed to say that now.

  1. The dresser

Why do I need a dresser? Do I need somewhere fancy to store t-shirts and underwear? Do socks need a whole drawer to spread out in? Not really.

I went through my dresser first and did it in steps. First, I made all my foldable clothes fit into one drawer as opposed to three. I had an affinity for funny shirts and graphic tees in high school and college and wore them much longer than I rightly should have (let’s be real I still do at home).



After sorting through those and saving some for a future quilt (yeah I know), I was able to get everything into two drawers, then one. This took a few times of sorting. I really felt like I needed a pair of sweat pants for every day of the week. But I wear the same three over and over again. Once the dresser was out of my room and gone and I saw the open floor I was addicted.

2. The Closet Planning: Capsules

Then came the more fun part: capsule planning. Now for some people that probably sounds “so bored” as my daughter says, but this was my favorite part. I got to go on Pinterest and plan my wardrobe. There are sites that you can pay and they will help you but I wanted to do it myself. Also, I am using “capsule” very loosely. For many people who have a real capsule wardrobe of 30 pieces I still look like a lush. I still want to downsize some more but right now I’m at a good point (I have about 55), and I’m not buying anything else to add so there’s a win.



Some things I learned from capsule planning are:

Pin outfits you really like. Don’t worry about if they would actually look good on you at this point just find stuff you like. Look for patterns. If you see a lot of tanks with maxi skirts than there’s a good bet you should have that in your closet. If you don’t see a lot of flowy tops but you have four of them hanging up, maybe time to get rid of them. I even printed out my top favorites and made a visual list of items that I should have to create the outfits I like. I have never been the most fashionable person in the world so this step was kind of new to me.

Selecting a few colors really does help. I had a lot of pretty bo-ho tops that I never wore because the colors made me look ill. I had a lot of colors that just plain didn’t match as well. I narrowed mine down to neutrals (white, black, gray, and navy) and accents (blush, yellow, teal, and olive). Anything not primarily in those colors I took out of my closet and boxed them up. I didn’t throw them away right away I just removed them to see how I would feel.

Duplicates need to go. I always though I needed like ten black shirts. They all fit different, I argued. I now have two, one loose and one tight, and that’s all I need.

3. More perks of less clothes

I have gotten a lot of compliments in the past few months about my style change and I think creating this “capsule” really made that happen. It takes half the time to get ready in the morning and I’m not saying I feel great every day I walk out the door but what I’m going to wear doesn’t consume as much time as it did.

I still have a ways to go but I managed to get rid of enough clothes that my husband was able to build a book case in the closet. That was a HUGE motivator for me. I have more books than anything else probably and wanted storage for them, even though I am still minimizing and getting rid of some. It’s a long process.

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Last thing I would like to point out is when you are minimizing your closet/wardrobe make sure you gather ALL your clothes. From the laundry, from the car, from your work, everywhere. Don’t just do the clothes in your room.

Hope this helps some of you out there! I had a few emails about the bedroom so please send me your thoughts I love hearing them.

Posted in Family, Opinion, parenting, Uncategorized

Mighty Minimalism: Step 1, the bedroom

Things have the taken the world over. We have so much stuff, most of it we don’t even

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need or use. Most of it, we wouldn’t even notice if it were gone. With the holidays creeping up on us this is the time of year consumerism is at it’s prime and more things enter your home.

 

I don’t really care if I have the newest phone (not that I could afford an iPhone X anyway). I don’t have a kitchen gadget that does something I can do with a knife. Half the time I don’t even use a strainer when I make pasta because I don’t want to dirty another dish (you just tilt and turn to get the water out, it’s a very precise system).

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However, my weakness is collecting items that relate to a memory. A napkin from that weird bistro in New York, or the rock from the bank of a river in the Shenandoah Valley, or movie stubs, or concert tickets, or trinkets- those kind of things are what make me somewhat of a clutter bug naturally. It’s taken a lot of hard work to change that way of living and focus on the memories, not the stuff.

One of my first projects on this road to minimalism has been to condense my closet to only 50 items. That may sound like a lot to some and not enough to others, but to me it’s a good sweet spot for now. I have to dress nice for work and I barely get out of my sweat pants at home so I can’t have a simple capsule wardrobe like those I admire on Pinterest. Maybe one day when I work from home I can throw out all my dress pants.

I then expanded to the whole bedroom, which is a small bedroom by most standards. As I looked around I realized on a daily basis we always had stuff on the floor. Books, clothes, kids toys, shoes, jackets; always something. It started to drive me nuts now that I was focusing in on it. So my overall goal became- declutter and minimalise my bedroom.

When you start to Google image search you come up with many cold looking rooms. Modern furniture with bare walls and no color scheme to speak of. This, to me, is not comfortable. Not in the slightest.

Very comfy

Then came Hygge. It’s a new craze (well not really new but starting to get around more) that is kind of minimalist at it’s core, but cozy. They use the word cozy a lot. It’s basically minimalism with scarves, fluffy blankets, and a hot beverage. All the things that make you comfortable, and nothing else.Image result for hygge

 

 

Minimize your bedroom:

A) The Closet

B) The Furniture

C) The Art & Knick-knacks

D) The Books & Work

 

 

Posted in Family, Holidays, Opinion, parenting, Uncategorized

In bed by 10; Halloween has really changed

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Halloween.

Just saying it gives you a feeling. Or at least it should I think. Every time I say it I feel this overwhelming sense of mystery and warmth. I feel the cool autumn breeze and smell the dead leaves on the ground. I see the lights of all the decorated homes, and taste the candy and Halloween inspired shots (don’t mix the two). And I mourn a holiday that is so much different now.

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Before kids, I looked forward to Halloween all year. Ever since high school, I started planning my costume in July. I prepped and prepared and made them from scratch (I don’t sew so the “scratch” thing may be a little misleading). Image may contain: 4 people, people standing and indoorI picked which parties and bars to attend on which nights because just one night wearing my costume was simply not acceptable.

 

 

This year, there will be no shots. There will be no hangover. There Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, selfie and closeupwill be no loud music and slutty costume contest. We have tried to have both and I fear that we failed, miserably. In the past few years, even after becoming parents, we tried to rally for all nighters on Halloween. Did the costumes, found a sitter, and saved up a little bit of drinking money. Lets just say, it didn’t end well and nursing a hangover around chocolate and screaming kids is not my idea of a good time. We did trick-or-treating, we went to the pumpkin patch, and we let the kids stay up a little later

Image may contain: 3 peoplethan usual. That was much more entertaining than throwing up at a gas station (no need to point fingers at who). (It was me).

 

This year, we are doing the family things. We are going to the Halloween parties, the Trunk-or-Treats, the pumpkin patch. We’re going trick-or-treating and celebrating at my library’s Halloween maze. We may need to skip the “adult Halloween time” for a yeImage may contain: 4 people, people standing, sky, shoes and outdoorar or two. Image may contain: 2 peopleNot something I ever thought I’d hear myself say but the time might be here that I need to hang up my witch’s hat by 10 instead of 3am. Is that bad? I don’t know, maybe. Maybe in a few years I’ll be craving the excitement of going out on the town for Halloween. But for now I’m looking forward to taking my bugs out, watching them get excited by all the costumes and decorations, and just hanging out with family. Not to mention the two weeks of horror movies, that needs to still happen or why are we even doing this?

Posted in Education, Family, Mental Health, Opinion, parenting, teaching, teen, toddlers, Uncategorized

Impulse Control, or lack there of

Stop hitting your brother.

Get your hands off your brother.

You can’t make your brother dance if he doesn’t want to.

Put down your brother.

He’s not a puppet, stop trying to make him talk.

No you can’t sit on his lap you’re twice his size.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST STOP TOUCHING YOUR BROTHER!

…impulse control. It’s one of the most difficult symptoms of ADHD that I have encountered. The endless talking, the inability to stop touching things, the constant

movement. More importantly, the lack of control. It’s hard as a parent and someone who grew up in a strict home to understand “can’t”. (Warning: Double negatives ahead) She can’t not touch him. She can’t not move around the couch. She can’t not speak over anyone else who is trying to speak to you. Anyone. Ever. And then of course is the backlash of “that’s just being a kid.” Just to clarify there’s a huge difference between a hyper child and a child with ADHD. A hyper child may have some issues keeping their hands to themselves, but in a child with ADHD you can see the physical discomfort as they try to restrain but can’t. If you haven’t had to see it that’s wonderful but I assure you it’s a problem.

Now that I have a better understanding of my daughter and what she’s going through I know now that no medicine is ever going to be able to help her in this area. Some parents can use the available treatments out there but even so, no amount of medication is going to work without some cognitive intervention.

How to handle impulse control:

    1. It’s okay to get mad/sad/frustrated. Just try to not project that onto your child. Yes, they need to be made aware that their behavior is not okay, and that it is causes conflict; however, making them feel guilty or responsible for your bad feelings is a bit much for a young child. For an older child, like 8 and up, I think they should know that what they are doing is causing you stress. That way you can work together on a plan of action.image
    2. Repeat yourself constantly. Something I loooooathe doing is repeating myself. I repeat; I loathe repeating myself. Did I mention I loathe it? Loathe what? Oh, repeating myself. Sometimes this is how it feels to talk to my daughter but I have to. I have to tell her many times that it’s time to put on pants. Most kids will putter and delay the inevitable but when impulse control is an issue it can take hours. Literally. Just to get dressed. One piece of clothing at a time; “Go put on your shoes”, “Please go get your shoes”, “I know that’s a beautiful a picture you just drew when I thought you were putting on your shoes but now you really need to put on your shoes”, “You know what? You can put them on in the car.” – not the best ending but it happens.
    3. I do believe in praising a child for being able to do something that is difficult for them. I think that it builds esteem, creates a bond, and gives them incentive. I do believe in special treats and awards. However, when my daughter started saying things like “if I’m good all day at school today I can have a snack when I get home right?” and I said, “Why don’t you be good all day at school today because that’s what you’re supposed to do and it will make me happy?” I got “the look” but we did have a good day that day. Awards can be over done but I feel like praise can’t, as long as it’s genuine. Kids are smart, and if you start praising them for every little thing (“Oh my gosh you walked down the hallway and didn’t trip that’s AMAZING”) they will know it’s not sincere. Praising for things that are milestone with impulse (“I’m so proud that you were able to get dressed before breakfast today, thank you.”) I think builds that positive experience.
    4. Routines. I’ve already posted about the importance of routines but consistency is crucial when teaching impulse control. If you do (blank) than (blank) happens and you feel (blank). This statement works for good and bad instances. Consistent punishments and consistent rewards are necessary when trying to change behaviors. We have a schedule for after school: snack, play outside, come in and help set table, eat dinner, play alone, bedtime routine.
    5. Learn the beauty of physical work. Chores. Wonderful chores. Cleaning up her bedroom has little appeal (although sometimes she really gets into it). However, doing things she sees me doing like the dishes, setting the table, feeding the cat, wiping down counters and tables; are all things she likes to do on her own. It occupies her, burns some energy, and keeps her out of trouble. I am starting a chore chart soon so we will see how that goes. Also, running is a godsend. Make up reasons for them to run. I like to pretend that the swing set in the furthest corner of our yard is the safe zone. So, she has to run from there to the house several times per game.
    6. Along the same lines, games are great tools for learning a new skill. Simon Says is one of my favorites. We play inside and out. When inside I like to put down colored paper in the hallway and make her go back and forth. If she steps off the square before I say the next “Simon Says” she loses. This teaches her to wait and listen to instruction before acting.
Posted in Education, Family, literature, Opinion, parenting, reading, summer, teaching, teen, toddlers, Uncategorized

Woodland Adventure Handbook

Review: Woodland Adventure Handbook by Adam Dove is a book I reviewed for work that I thought some of my readers might like.

It’s a little handbook about family activities to do in the woods. Adam Dove using ideals from UK “forest schools” and makes them approachable for parents and teachers. Learning through play is not a new idea by any means but it is becoming increasingly popular. TInkergarten, Montessori, and others have grown in the last decade. Why? I think the standards and pressures for what children are supposed to know when has become almost excessive. Parents are trying to find alternative ways of teaching that don’t require young children to sit at a desk 8 hours a day.
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Each section has a story, followed by how to set up for the upcoming activities, then games and things to create that go with the story. At the end is a wrap up of what was learned.

For example, section 5 is called “Magic potions and wizards’ power wands”. The story at the beginning is just explaining the ingredients needed to create the potion that can only be used to help others. It says to follow stick arrows and footprints. So, before you go out in the woods with your children you make stick arrows and footprints that lead to the things they need. They follow it, create potions, craft wands, and play a game.

It’s a really cute book with some new ideas for any parent wanting to do more outside and get more involved with your child’s education. I would think the target age range could be anywhere from 3 to 7. Possibly a little older if you make it more elusive for them.

Posted in DIY, Family, health, Mental Health, Opinion, parenting, teen, toddlers, Uncategorized

Safety zone: Child’s bedroom

There’s a lot out there on moms and dads having “me time”. It’s super important, I’m not denying that. I am however advocating the kids need “me time” too. Time to reconnect, time to calm, time to be bored. The best place for that is outside, and if you’re lucky enough to have a space outside for your kid to play alone than use it! However, second best is their bedroom.

Their bedroom should be their safe zone. They should want to be in there. Don’t force your decorating aesthetic on them. I want my whole house in Harry Potter decor but it’s just not going to happen because my kids haven’t even seen a whole movie yet (I know, it’s on my list).

My daughter decided she wanted a flamingo bedroom when I told her she couldn’t share a room with her brother anymore. It was kind of a sad day but after she started picking out some things for us to use she pepped up pretty fast.

Perks:

  1. More likely to stay in there during the night and during bedtime: if you have had issues with this you know how big of a deal that is.
  2. Has a place to go when needs to cool off: again if you have had issues with this you know how important this is too. We have a small house so it’s crucial my kids feel comfortable in their bedrooms to diffuse.
  3. Gives them a place to play quietly when quiet time is needed: if you have more than one child, or one but you do work from home or something else that requires quiet, having a safe zone room is crucial. Before we made over my daughter’s room getting her brother to nap was super hard. She would want to be out in the living room with us or playing in his room. Now, she has a craft/reading area in her bedroom that she will play with until he’s asleep and we can play together.
  4. Gives them a safe place: kind of goes with the cool off one, but also for other intense feelings. Sometimes kids just need to cry or scream or vent. Sometimes they need to do that alone before you try to intervene and make them talk through it.

But how?

Well for one, ask them what they want. There’s almost no theme or idea that you can’t tweak to make you both happy. Unless, of course, it’s Dora (again yes). Also, we did not have a “moving to a new bedroom and need decor” budget in our savings. So, we took things we already had and made it work for the room. I think total I spent about $45 bucks on paint, new sheets, and one stuffed flamingo (optional).

We painted the hutch that a friend was getting rid of, the mirror from Walmart, and the green shelves that were currently in her brother’s room but had nothing on them. I put the dresser in her brother’s room that now had more space with her bed gone and moved the bookcase into her room since she is the one who is using the books more.

The princess netting was over her bed in her brother’s room but we decided to use it over her reading area to give it more of a separation. Additions have been a lava lamp for calming down at night and an oil diffuser.